紅蘿蔔削皮器. LÜT #27：英語精讀講義

Why would anybody peel a carrot 文法

為什麼還會有人用手削紅蘿蔔，

when they could use an oversized pencil sharpener

明明可以用一個超大削鉛筆機，

built just for them?

而且還是專為紅蘿蔔打造的？

And the same goes for cigarette pencils. 片語搭配

香菸造型的鉛筆也是同理。

It's episode 27 of LÜT.

這是《LÜT》第27集。

For pencils that are more musical,

想讓鉛筆更有音樂感，

grab yourself a pair of drumstick pencils. 片語搭配

就來一對鼓棒鉛筆。

And David Bizer records the waveform of a word or phrase you speak

David Bizer 會記錄你說出的單字或片語的波形，

and then makes this,

然後做出這個東西，

whose pieces you can pop out to make your own waveform 講解

你可以把上面的組件取出來，拼成自己的波形，

into a necklace.

再把它變成一條項鍊。

He's also published instructions

他也公布了製作教學，

on how to make your own for free.

教你如何免費自己做一個。

Now, brass knuckles are a more useful form of jewelry, 文化背景

銅指虎算是一種更實用的首飾，

especially when you upgrade to the kind that's also a taser.

尤其是升級成兼具電擊器功能的款式後。

Projectile defences improved by using a target dummy,

要提升對拋射物的防禦能力，可以使用假人標靶，

so you better choose the bleeding zombie target. 文法

所以最好選擇會流血的殭屍標靶。

This brain-eater will actually bleed when hit.

這個食腦怪物被打中後真的會流血。

You can rub it in by wearing a Kentucky Fried Brains T-shirt 慣用語

你還可以穿上「Kentucky Fried Brains」T 恤繼續挖苦它，

or this one,

或者穿這件，

which reminds all of us that zombies were people too.

它提醒大家：殭屍也曾經是人。

Now, keep your hair tidy with periodic table barrettes 文法

現在，用元素週期表髮夾把頭髮整理好，

and make some customized art right away with myDaVinci. 片語搭配

並透過 myDaVinci 馬上訂製一件藝術品。

With one click,

只要按一下，

you can personalize and order prints

就能依照個人喜好客製並訂購印刷品，

just the way you want them. 文法

做成你想要的樣子。

Now, while photos in lockets are romantic,

雖然墜飾盒裡的照片很浪漫，

this Mystery Science Theater 3000 frame pendant 文化背景

但這款 Mystery Science Theater 3000 相框墜飾

makes whatever photo you put in it 文法

能讓你放進去的任何照片

that much more hilarious. 文法

都變得好笑許多。

Stay safe and bright with Monkey Lights,

用 Monkey Lights 騎得安全又亮眼，

a brilliant array of LEDs for your bike tires

這是一組裝在自行車輪胎上的炫亮 LED 燈，

that can display patterns while you ride.

騎車時還能顯示各種圖案。

Ooh.

喔。

If it's a chilly bike ride you're taking,

如果你要在寒冷天氣裡騎車，

be sure to wear these matching lobster gloves and hat. 片語搭配

記得戴上這套相配的龍蝦手套和帽子。

Food time.

開飯時間。

Use this mold to bake a 1-Up cupcake

用這個模具烤一個 1-Up 杯子蛋糕，

and decorate food with googly eyes

再用活動眼珠裝飾食物，

that you can eat.

而且這些眼珠還能吃。

Season the rest of your food

替其他食物調味時，

with some salt and pepper shakers

可以用這組鹽罐和胡椒罐，

gnome butt.

它們是小矮人屁股造型。

Or if you feline like it, 慣用語

或者，如果你喜歡貓味十足的款式，

use these shakers that look like cat butts.

就用這組貓屁股造型的調味罐。

Now, cats also love couches,

貓也喜歡沙發，

so get yourself a cat tunnel couch.

所以替自己添一張貓隧道沙發吧。

If you've upgraded from a cat to a baby, 慣用語

如果你已經從養貓「升級」到養寶寶，

don't carry it like a square. 用詞

可別用那麼老派的方式抱小孩。

Stick your kid in a baby holster

把孩子塞進嬰兒槍套，

like a real cowboy.

像個真正的牛仔一樣。

You know, like the kind that ride on dogs.

就是那種騎在狗身上的牛仔，你懂的。

Feeling handy? 用詞

覺得自己很會動手？

Paint the house with electrically conductive paint

用導電油漆粉刷房子，

and install this power-up plate on top of your switches

再把這塊能量升級面板裝在開關上，

to control your lights with buttons and a joystick.

就能用按鈕和搖桿控制燈光。

You can install the whole thing with a handgun drill

整套裝置可以用手槍造型的電鑽安裝，

and then go to the hardware store

然後再去五金行，

to cut this rude key into something useful.

把這把不雅的鑰匙胚切成能用的鑰匙。

The Labyrinth Aquarium is a mansion for sea life, 慣用語

Labyrinth Aquarium 是海洋生物的豪宅，

but don't count out owning this one 片語動詞

但也別急著排除把這款帶回家的可能，

you can fill with actual jellyfish

你可以在裡面養真正的水母，

they sell you.

而且商家連水母都賣給你。

Even scarier is a jack-o-lantern with pumpkin teeth. 文化背景

更嚇人的是長著南瓜牙的南瓜燈。

Your pumpkin will feel beautiful.

你的南瓜會覺得自己美極了。

So, next,

接下來，

raise your own self-esteem 片語搭配

提升一下自己的自尊心，

by using self-deprecating golf balls from TheCheeky. 用詞

方法是使用 TheCheeky 的自嘲高爾夫球。

They contain phrases like,

球上印著這樣的句子：

"We both know that shot was my fault." 語氣意圖

「我們都知道，剛才那一桿是我的錯。」

Tetris is kind of like putting together a puzzle, 語氣意圖

《俄羅斯方塊》有點像在拼拼圖，

which makes this a puzzle puzzle. 慣用語

所以這就成了「拼圖的拼圖」。

ThinkGeek offers a pack of 566 digit magnets,

ThinkGeek 推出一組含 566 個數字的磁鐵，

which you can use to spell things out like an old calculator, 片語動詞

你可以像用老式計算機那樣拿它們拼出文字，

but on your fridge,

只不過是在冰箱上，

which might contain soda bottles.

而冰箱裡可能放著汽水瓶。

But why not replace them with Vat19's giant cola gummies? 語氣意圖

不過，何不把它們換成 Vat19 的巨型可樂軟糖？

The only thing more luxurious is a slide for your yacht, 文法

唯一更奢華的東西，就是替你的遊艇裝一座滑梯，

which you of course captain 語氣意圖

當然，遊艇由你親自掌舵，

while wearing a pair of 24-karat gold-dipped Nikes 表達脈絡

同時腳穿一雙鍍上 24K 金的 Nike 鞋，

while sipping tea brewed with your TIE Fighter Death Star infuser.

再喝著用 TIE Fighter Death Star 泡茶器泡出的茶。

But don't do these things alone. 表達脈絡

不過，這些事可別獨自做。

Be watched by these ominous security cameras

讓這些陰森的監視攝影機盯著你，

that are actually a lamp.

其實整組只是一盞燈。

In this notebook,

在這本筆記本裡，

your doodles and scribbling become automatic tattoo art,

你的塗鴉和亂畫會自動變成刺青圖案，

and even trash can be useful, 文法

就連垃圾也能派上用場，

like these playing cards 文法

比如這些撲克牌，

Metrodeck makes out of discarded subway cards.

是 Metrodeck 用廢棄的地鐵卡做成的。

Your furniture can contain optical illusions

家具裡也可以藏著視覺錯覺，

like these cracked cabinets or perspective curtains

比如這些裂開的櫃子，或帶有透視圖案的窗簾；

that close off a room 片語動詞

它們能隔開房間，

while presenting what looks like lies behind them.

同時呈現出彷彿藏在後方的景象。

Here's a table that is a bad dog,

這是一張「壞狗狗」桌子，

and the glass sides of this chair

而這張椅子的玻璃側板

make it look impossibly balanced from the side. 文法

讓它從側面看起來像以不可能的方式維持平衡。

In the same way that letters on a street are elongated 文法

就像街道上的字母會被拉長，

so you can read them from a shallow angle, 片語搭配

讓你從很斜的角度也能看清楚，

so are the numbers on Tokyoflash's newest watch.

Tokyoflash 最新手錶上的數字也是如此。

From above,

從正上方看，

it looks like almost nothing.

幾乎什麼都看不出來。

And of course,

當然，

because Tokyoflash is so saucy, 用詞

既然 Tokyoflash 這麼俏皮，

using code VSTF 文法

使用優惠碼 VSTF，

gets you $10 off.

就能折抵 10 美元。

All of those things are really cool,

這些東西都酷斃了，

and you can find out more by clicking the links 片語動詞

想知道更多，可以點擊相關連結，

in this video's description.

連結就在本影片的說明欄裡。

Of course,

當然，

Vsauce also has a Facebook page,

Vsauce 也有 Facebook 粉絲專頁、

a Twitter page,

Twitter 頁面，

and as they say in Poland, 表達脈絡

還有用波蘭人的說法，

Vsauce cupcakes.

Vsauce 杯子蛋糕。