與他人建立融洽關係 - 6分鐘英語：英語精讀講義

Six Minute English from BBCLearningEnglish.com.

來自 BBCLearningEnglish.com 的《六分鐘英語》。

Hello,

大家好，

this is Six Minute English from BBC Learning English.

這裡是 BBC 英語教學的《六分鐘英語》。

I'm Neil.

我是尼爾。

And I'm Georgina.

我是喬治娜。

Georgina and I have got to know each other very well 文法

喬治娜和我已經非常了解彼此了

after working together for so long.

畢竟我們在一起工作了這麼久。

I know what sandwiches Neil has for lunch.

我知道尼爾午餐吃什麼三明治。

Egg and tomato,

雞蛋和番茄，

right, Neil?

對吧，尼爾？

Right.

沒錯。

And I know it really annoys Georgina

我也知道喬治娜會很反感

when people don't wash up their cups in the staff kitchen. 片語動詞

當人們在員工廚房不洗自己的杯子時。

So unhygienic.

太不衛生了。

But just as important as getting to know someone socially or at work 講解

但和在社交或工作中了解一個人同樣重要的

is getting on with people.

是與人相處融洽。

To get on with someone is a useful phrasal verb 片語動詞

「Get on with someone」是一個實用的動詞片語，

meaning to like someone

意思是喜歡某人

and enjoy a friendly relationship with them.

並與他們保持友好的關係。

Which is really important

這非常重要，

if you work with them every day.

特別是如果你每天都要和他們一起工作。

And there's another word to describe the good understanding

還有一個詞可以用來描述兩個朋友之間的良好默契

and communication between two friends,

和溝通，

rapport. 用詞

也就是「rapport」（默契/融洽）。

Yes,

是的，

how you build rapport and get on with people 片語搭配

如何建立默契並與人融洽相處

has been the subject of many self-help books over the years 片語搭配

多年來一直是許多自助書籍的主題，

and is the topic of this program.

這也是本集節目的主題。

Well,

嗯，

you and I must have great rapport, Georgina,

你和我一定有很好的默契，喬治娜，

because that leads perfectly onto my quiz question. 表達脈絡

因為這完美地引出了我的問答題。

In 1936,

在1936年，

American writer Dale Carnegie

美國作家戴爾·卡內基

wrote a famous self-help book on building rapport. 用詞

寫了一本關於建立人際關係的著名自助書。

It sold over 30 million copies,

這本書的銷量超過了3000萬冊，

making it one of the best-selling books of all time. 講解

成為有史以來最暢銷的書籍之一。

But what was it called?

但它叫什麼名字呢？

Is it A,

是 A，

How to Get Rich Quick? 慣用語

《如何快速致富》？

B,

B，

How to Stop Worrying and Make Friends?

《如何停止憂慮並結交朋友》？

or C,

還是 C，

How to Win Friends and Influence People? 用詞

《人性的弱點》（如何贏得朋友並影響他人）？

Hmm,

唔，

I think I know this,

我覺得我知道這個，

Neil.

尼爾。

I'm going to say C, 語氣意圖

我選 C，

How to Win Friends and Influence People.

《人性的弱點》。

Okay,

好的，

Georgina,

喬治娜，

we'll find out if that's right at the end of the program. 片語動詞

我們在節目最後會揭曉這是否正確。

When it comes to getting on with people, 表達脈絡

談到與人相處，

psychologist Emily Alison has a few ideas.

心理學家艾蜜莉·艾莉森有一些見解。

She's built a career working with the police 片語搭配

她在工作中一直與警察合作，

as they build rapport with criminal suspects. 用詞

幫助他們與犯罪嫌疑人建立信任關係。

Emily is the author of a new book,

艾蜜莉是一本新書的作者，

Rapport: The Four Ways to Read People. 慣用語

書名是《建立默契：解讀他人的四種方式》。

And she told BBC Radio 4 program All in the Mind,

她在 BBC Radio 4 的節目《頭腦特工》中提到，

it isn't easy to get along with everyone. 片語動詞

與每個人都相處融洽並不容易。

I often describe rapport-building in a relationship

我經常把在一段關係中建立默契

as like walking a tightrope 慣用語

比作走鋼索

because you really do need to maintain 講解

因為你確實需要保持

that balance of being objective,

保持客觀的那種平衡，

treating people with compassion, 片語搭配

帶著同情心對待別人，

but that doesn't mean I'm sympathetic, 文法

但這並不意味著我同情他們，

I'm collusive.

或者我與他們串通一氣。

It's that balance between judgment and avoidance. 片語搭配

這是評判與迴避之間的那種平衡。

Emily describes rapport

艾蜜莉將建立默契

building as like walking a tightrope,

描述為像走鋼索一樣，

an idiom to describe being in a difficult situation

這個慣用語用來形容處於困境之中，

which requires carefully considering what to do. 片語搭配

需要謹慎考慮該怎麼做。

Building rapport with terrorists

與恐怖分子建立信任關係

or violent criminals isn't easy.

或者暴力罪犯並不容易。

Emily doesn't sympathize 片語搭配

艾蜜莉並不同情

with what they've done,

他們的所作所為，

but she tries to remain objective, 片語搭配

但她盡量保持客觀，

to base her judgment on the facts, 片語搭配

根據事實作出判斷，

not personal feelings.

而不是個人感情。

In her book,

在她的書中，

Emily identifies four main communication styles,

艾蜜莉確定了四種主要的溝通風格，

which she names after animals. 片語搭配

她以動物的名字來命名它們。

The best at building rapport

最善於建立默契的

is the friendly and cooperative monkey.

是友好而合作的猴子。

And there's a pair of opposites, 片語搭配

還有一對截然相反的類型，

the bossy lion who wants to take charge 片語搭配

喜歡發號施令、想掌控一切的

and control things

專橫的獅子，

and the more passive mouse.

以及更被動的老鼠。

Here's Emily talking

以下是艾蜜莉在

to BBC Radio 4's

BBC Radio 4 的

All in the Mind about

《頭腦特工》節目中談論

the fourth animal,

第四種動物，

the T-Rex.

暴龍。

Try to listen out for the communication 片語動詞

試著聽出這種性格的

style of this personality.

溝通風格。

You've got the T-Rex,

還有暴龍，

which is conflict.

代表著衝突。

So this is argument,

所以這是關於爭論，

whether you're approaching it from a positive position 文法

無論你是從積極的立場出發，

where you can be direct,

可以直接、

frank about your message, 用詞

坦誠地傳達你的訊息，

or you approach that in a negative

還是你以一種消極的

way by being attacking, 用詞

方式來處理，具有攻擊性、

judgmental,

評判性、

argumentative,

好辯、

sarcastic,

喜歡諷刺，

that actually breeds the same behavior back. 慣用語

這實際上會招致同樣的回報。

So anyone who has teenagers

所以任何有青少年的家長

will 100% recognize that. 用詞

都會百分之百地認同這一點。

Um,

嗯，

if you meet sarcasm with sarcasm, 片語搭配

如果你以諷刺對待諷刺，

it's only going to go one way. 慣用語

事情只會朝著一個方向發展。

All four communication

這四種溝通

styles have good and bad points. 片語搭配

風格都有其優缺點。

On the positive side, 表達脈絡

從積極的一面來看，

T-Rex type people are frank.

暴龍類型的人很坦率。

They express themselves in an open, 片語搭配

他們以一種開放、

honest way.

誠實的方式表達自己。

But T-Rex types

但是暴龍類型的人

can also be sarcastic,

也可能喜歡挖苦別人，

say the opposite of what they really mean 文法

說出與自己真實想法相反的話，

in order to hurt someone's feelings 講解

以便傷害別人的感情

or criticize them in a funny way.

或者以一種好笑的方式批評他們。

Yes,

是的，

sarcasm is a strange thing,

諷刺是一件奇怪的事情，

like saying,

就像說，

"Oh, I really like your haircut,"

「哦，我真的很喜歡你的髮型，」

when in fact you don't. 片語搭配

而實際上你並不喜歡。

Yes,

是的，

there's an English saying that

英國有句諺語說

sarcasm is the lowest form of humor, 慣用語

諷刺是最低級的幽默形式，

but I think British people can be quite sarcastic at times. 片語搭配

但我認為英國人有時真的挺愛諷刺的。

Well,

嗯，

I can't imagine you'd make many friends being rude to people. 講解

我無法想像對別人粗魯能交到很多朋友。

Maybe they should read Dale Carnegie's self-help book.

也許他們應該讀讀戴爾·卡內基的自助書。

Ah,

啊，

yes,

對了，

your quiz question,

你的問答題，

Neil.

尼爾。

Was my answer right?

我的答案對嗎？

In my quiz question,

在我的問答題中，

I asked Georgina for the title

我問了喬治娜關於書名的問題，

of Dale Carnegie's best-selling self-help book

即戴爾·卡內基關於建立人際關係的

about building rapport.

暢銷自助書。

What did you say?

你選了什麼？

I said the book is called C,

我說這本書叫 C，

How to Win Friends and Influence People.

《人性的弱點》。

Which is the correct answer.

這是正確的答案。

And I guess you've read it, 語氣意圖

我猜你已經讀過了，

Georgina,

喬治娜，

because you have lots of friends.

因為你有很多朋友。

I hope you're not being sarcastic, 語氣意圖

我希望你不是在諷刺我，

Neil.

尼爾。

Absolutely not. 語氣意圖

絕對沒有。

I'm not a sarcastic T-Rex type,

我不是一個愛挖苦人的暴龍類型，

more of a friendly monkey. 文法

更像是一隻友善的猴子。

Okay,

好的，

well,

嗯，

let's stay friends

讓我們繼續做朋友吧，

and recap the vocabulary from this program, 表達脈絡

並回顧一下本集節目的詞彙，

starting with rapport,

首先是「rapport」（默契/融洽），

a good feeling between two people

兩個人之間的良好感覺

based on understanding and communication. 文法

建立在理解和溝通的基礎上。

If you get on with someone,

如果你「get on with someone」（與某人合得來），

you like and enjoy a friendly relationship with them.

你就會喜歡他們並享受與他們的友好關係。

Walking a tightrope

「Walking a tightrope」（走鋼索）

means to be in a difficult situation

意思是處於一個困難的境地，

which requires careful consideration of what to do.

需要仔細考慮該怎麼做。

To be objective

「To be objective」（保持客觀）

is to base your actions on facts

是將你的行動建立在事實上

rather than personal feelings. 文法

而不是個人感覺上。

When building rapport with someone,

在與人建立默契時，

it's good to be frank,

坦率（frank）是一件好事，

to express yourself in an open,

也就是以一種開放、

honest way.

誠實的方式表達自己。

But not sarcastic,

但不要諷刺（sarcastic），

to say the opposite of what you really mean

即說出與真實意圖相反的話，

in order to hurt someone's feelings

為了傷害他人的感情，

or criticize them in a humorous way.

或以幽默的方式批評別人。

Well,

好了，

Neil,

尼爾，

if we run over six minutes, 片語動詞

如果我們的節目超過六分鐘，

we'll break our rapport with the Six Minute English producer. 片語搭配

我們就會破壞與《六分鐘英語》製作人的默契。

So that's all for this 表達脈絡

這就是本集節目的全部內容。

program. Join us again soon

歡迎很快再次加入我們，

for more trending topics 用詞

了解更多熱門話題

and useful vocabulary.

和實用詞彙。

And remember to download

請記得下載

the BBC Learning English app

BBC 英語教學應用程式，

and stay friends 語氣意圖

並與我們保持朋友關係，

by following us on social media.

在社群媒體上關注我們。

Bye for now.

暫且再見。

Bye.

再見。

Six Minute English from the BBC.

來自 BBC 的《六分鐘英語》。